one cannot live on high end manhattans made with smoked vermouth alone — a huge fucking frozen margarita machine and free line dancing lessons — beer bellies, cowboy hats, and lots of bottle blondes — I want to drink tall boys of Hamm's or whatever — mysterious dude at the Chron — needed to do something ridiculous while wearing cowboy boots — five different varieties of Red Bull — potent and syrupy sweet potion that will simultaneously invoke mishap-filled high school spring breaks and also that stomach ache you got from housing too many Skittles — crazy-hot ghost pepper jack cheese — for extra gluttony — if you don't already know what you're doing, you'll still feel silly and fuck up a lot — We looked like idiots but laughed for 2 hours.
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